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~~ 497 ~~
~~~ Tweedles ~~
You, can't get pins and needles,
And if you're very quick,
And, you really must take care,
So, if you go hunting for a Tweedle,
But, then on the other hand,
So you outa' be like me,
© August 7, 2001
~~ 498 ~~
~~~ A Naughty Girl, A Grizzly Bear ~~~
A naughty girl with long blonde hair,
That naughty girl she tried to flee,
That grizzly chased her down the street,
That naughty girl just screamed and cried,
© August 14, 2001
~~ 499 ~~
~~~ A Duck And Kangaroo ~~~
There was a silly duck I knew,
But, that kangaroo and silly duck,
They lost their feathers and their hair,
So, they sent their children to duck school,
If, you mix up ducks with kangaroos,
So, kangaroos should not wed ducks,
© August 14, 2001
~~~ 500 ~~
~~~ Lady On A Bike ~~~
A crazy lady on a bike,
The ride she got was with a friend,
But, those chatting friends who don't forget,
So, that crazy lady on that bike,
© August 14, 2001
~~ 503 ~~
~~~ The Lady and The Cow ~~~
There was an old Lady that sat on a shoe,
The lady said, "Cow why is it you ask".
The Lady said, "Cow I have nothing to say".
© 25, August 2001
~~ 504 ~~
~~~ Tea For Two ~~~
A little mouse and little cat,
© August 25, 2001
~~ 549 ~~
~~~ Don't Chase an Old Cat ~~~
If! You chase an old cat don't pull his tail,
He'll scratch you and bite you and screech and he'll wail,
Please take my advice or you'll stir up a gale,
© March 26, 2002
~~ 574 ~~ ~~~ I am Me ~~~ Of all the things I'd like to be, I'd like to be myself, So be content with who you are or you may pay the price, "Pigs", Who would be a pig except a pig, "Lambs" Who would be a lamb except a lamb, "Chooks", Who would be a chook except a chook, "Cows" Who would be a cow except a cow, "Fish", Who would be a fish except a fish, "Me" Who would want to be me? © July 7, 2002
From touching furry Tweedles,
But, Tweedles they are very hard to catch.
You never see them in the city,
Or the country, that's a pity,
You can only catch them from a Tweedle patch.
You can catch them with a stick,
And put them in a plastic shopping bag.
Then, you can take them home,
Treat them to an ice-cream cone,
And glue them in a scarp book with some clag.
They, don't climb into your hair,
And make a rope and try to skip away.
'Cos, Tweedle's they are clever,
They survive in any weather,
But, a Tweedle patch is where they like to stay.
Don't take a pin or needle,
Just take a bag of onions and a peach.
And, if it is a sunny day,
You'll find Tweedle's at their play,
At the sea-side on a yellow sandy beach.
Tweedle's have a big brass band,
Where they toot a horn and tweetle on a flute.
And they play the violin,
Rattling noises on a tin,
While eating pounds and pounds of rotting fruit.
And let those Tweedle's be,
And leave them Tweedle's zac-ly where they sit.
'Cos, you'll only end up numb,
And feeling pretty dumb,
'Cos, maybe pins and needles is all that you will git.
She flew a kite up in the air,
And where it went she didn't care,
Until it hit a grizzly bear.
From that bear up in the tree,
She ran as fast, as fast could be,
Before she came that grizzly's tea.
Over chairs and over seats,
Until he ran her off her feet,
And then he said, "Your mine to eat".
Not to be that bears inside,
But, no matter how she tried and tried,
That bear just gulped, then burped and sighed.
Who was married to a kangaroo,
They fed their kids on cumquat stew,
So, they'd never get Egyptian flue.
They cooked their goose, ran out of luck,
Their kids got sick from eating muck,
And eating paint from off a truck.
They didn't know just who, what, where,
If plums are plums and pears are pears,
Or pigs were pigs and chairs were chairs.
To not grow up and act the fool,
But, kangaroos and ducks aren't cool,
When it comes to swimming pools.
They, don't have webbed feet, or wear red shoes,
And to wear galoshes just won't do,
'Cos, water makes their feet turn blue.
'Cos, kangaroos they kick and buck,
And ducks are mainly bred to pluck
For eiderdowns, or just pot-luck.
Rode across a railway spike,
So, she had to hitch a ride or hike,
Until she fixed her broken bike.
Who's chatter drove her round the bend,
So, I'll bring this tale unto an end,
And, forget about that chattering friend.
The ones who call you dear or pet,
Just put them in some wet cement
Until from chatting they relent.
Who rode across a railway spike,
She didn't walk and didn't hike,
She just rode her broken bike.
Bippity, boppity, bippity, boo.
Along came a cow and said, "How do you do,
Sitting alone on that silly old shoe".
Flippity, floppity, flippity flask
"'Cos" The cow said, "Dear lady your wearing a mask,
That is the reason, I really must ask".
Skippity, skoppity, skippity, skay
And she rose off that shoe and just walked away
And never at all had nothing to say.
Around a teapot they both sat,
With plate of bickies and some cheese,
To eat and nibble as they please.
"Please pour the tea", Said cat to mouse,
"You really have a lovely house".
"Thank you cat that nice of you
I'll use my teapot painted blue".
Cat and mouse they had such fun,
Sipping tea with Boston bun,
Cheese and bickies by the score,
Then cat went home at half past four,
Because that old cat may turn sort of' pale.
So, unless you are silly don't pull on his tail.
If! You chase an old cat and pull on his tail.
'Cos, if I be just who I are, it will always bring me wealth,
Some others like to be someone, who they're really not,
It brings them pain and malcontent
And makes them loose the plot.
And all the things that happen next, may not be too nice,
You may grow fleece or pointy ears
Or grow two extra legs,
Then all as once your life will be, full of your worst fears.
I don't want to be a pig, not even a clean pig
'Cos, pigs smell, I know 'cos I can tell,
Every time I go near a pigs sty I cry,
"Oh phew! What an awful smell".
I don't want to be a lamb, not even a wooly lamb
'Cos, being locked inside a gate I'd hate,
And then end up in a butchers shop as chops
To be eaten up with gravy on a plate.
I don't want to be a chook, not even in a book
'Cos, many chooks are stricken down as chickens,
To be cooked as eggs or wings and legs,
Or roasted up until their finger licken.
I don't want to be a cow, not even a little cow
'Cos, cows are lumps of meat that have four feet,
And they are purchased by McDonalds
To be minced up into burgers as a treat.
I don't want to be a fish, it's not my wish
'Cos, fishes they do fine, until they're caught upon a line,
And, then get stuck upon a plate
To be dished up with a bottle of white wine.
I am me, and I want to be me
'Cos, being me is right, any day or night,
And I am so nice and cute,
Like the sweetest type of fruit
Just the type who'd never give a friend a fright.