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~~~ Love Sublime ~~~
They measure time you waste my dear, in multitudes of years.
And what I cried for you in pain, I'll never cry for you again in pain or cry again in tears.
Those words we heard were angry words, not words of love we should have heard.
So! Your parting left me free'er than a bird.
I wondered here and wondered there, aimlessly of course.
I travelled far and travelled wide, I'd lost my meaning of my life and also lost the meaning of my choice.
Until I found a place of trees, a place where peace floats through the trees with ease and brings us endless harmony.
So! I waited to be free.
I waited there for it all to be, my waiting was of patiently.
Then! There came a girl, a perfect pearl, she was standing next to me, and when she touched my soul she set me free.
I looked into her soft, soft eyes to see the path that showed that sign to see her feelings join with thoughts of mine.
Then my life became a symitry, as fleeting as my prime.
My prime was gone, it passed me by so my tears they seem to cry.
Then! She took my hand into her hand and walked though paths of timeless sand into this wondrous land of love sublime.
My heart it raced a racing pace, of a man whose been displaced with life without a trace of solitary truth.
I stopped, and then I finally found my youth.
May 26, 2000
~~ 330 ~~
~~~ Time Misspent ~~~
We gave to each a weakened cry as we wiped the tears of goodbye from our already bloodied battered rose.
May 27, 2000
~~ 368 ~~
~~~ Broken Dreaming ~~~
The Black and Silver ascends the intricate mountain,
All around is a sort of semi circle
The Black and Silver bends
Only evil will befall the Black and Silver,
Her Spirit and her Dreaming has been taken,
September 17, 2000
~~ 369 ~~
~~~ Realms of Her Eternity ~~~
silently she creeps, slowly at first
September 18, 2000
~~ 370 ~~
~~~ Left Me for Charlie ~~~
deafening silence, not a sound
the humidity takes our every breath,
a new sound broke the silence,
fear of knowing death could just but seconds away
the smell of urine hit my nostrils as,
September 19, 2000
~~ 371 ~~
~~~ Waves of Infancy ~~~
waves of infancy cover the redemption of fools,
September 19, 2000
~~ 386 ~~
~~~ This Pain Inside of Me ~~~
Why do I carry this pain inside of me?
Is my time at hand to be taken to suffer again?
Why does my God forsake all my prayers of help?
My God is the universe of life and all things universal to life,
October 3, 2000
~~398 ~~
~~~ Sonnet ~ No. 1~~~
Melancholy moments, of days of yesteryear,
October 18, 2000
A rose of love or hate I do not state.
What have we done?
We've lost the only one that took us from our lives of love to shattered dis-repose.
Or who's to know?
Those hours will, no more be getting late.
So if it must be, then let it be,
Then we can see the space and time of our utter lonely dis-regret,
Or better yet!
The past of time at last.
Have we selfishly lost our insecurities of delusions within our cluttered minds of time misspent,
To fade into our empty timeless past.
with each step the processed air expels,
short and sharp they come and go
knowing how far to rise before
the cessation of those steps.
faces look,
some happy,
others with the looks of complexity
being the creation of New Hope.
not knowing her Ancestral Dreaming,
a fire erupts and encircles the Black and Silver,
engulfing her the Ring of Fire ascends
and with it the Black and Silver's Spirit and Dreaming ascends.
she has broken the Sacred Law of the Dreaming.
The Gnundjana will come, the Boolya men will come,
The Kuruyndjadii will come, the Khadja men will come,
The Ancestral Spirits of the Tribal Elders will come.
They will strip the flesh from the bones of the Black and Silver,
Then they will devour the heart and liver of the Black and Silver
making the Black and Silver no more.
the Black and Silver is no more,
all her enemies have seen her and her chosen people.
The Waroo Jinghi has come,
The Namoonah and Pingoo are no more,
The Kooroona and Nungnah are no more,
The Sacred Law of the Dreaming has been broken,
The Sacred Law of the Dreaming is no more.
then, with a quickened pace she moves.
clutched to her breast is a small shape from her past,
her heart races in panic, afraid of being heard.
she stops to listen,
straining above the silence of the night
as the darkness enters her head,
fear grips her as she falls,
the falling stops with a crunch,
still clutching her past her eyes close.
tears pool in her mind as she slowly slips into the past,
the darkness engulfs her in the completeness of her past,
then by the power of creation the coldness of death settles upon her
to guide her into the realms of her eternity.
her past is no longer for her to hold,
the grayness of death has consumed her broken body,
her eyes stare into the absolute of nothingness
but, within the depth of her eyes the pathway to her soul exists,
those who come for her see the path within her eyes,
they knowingly smile in the understanding that
her spirit lives for tomorrow
and her yesterdays belong to the dead.
except for deep throated crickets.
four of us with blackened faces
lay waiting, watching,
not a sound but crickets and
the occasional barking of a frog to its mate.
with our throats dry and void of any moisture
we silently gasp for air,
sweat and dirt covers our bodies
causing unbearable irritation
but, we lay still, silent, watching and waiting.
an unfamiliar sound,
I felt it cross my arm then stop,
inches from my face two eyes meet mine,
tasting the air around my face
its tongue it brushed my cheek,
I froze, scared to blink, scared to call out
for fear of giving our position away,
panic took control of my mind,
fear of an agonising death filled my head,
then, as quickly as it came it went.
I felt the warm liquid soak into my greens.
three blackened faces look at my fear,
one face blankly whispered, "did it get ya' mate",
"no thank God", I whispered back,
"It left me for charlie".
the light hits the dark with a flash of improbability
only to land on a void of incest,
screams of pain are heard above the simplicity of the soul
as feet race to be silenced beneath the quadrant of complexity,
minds burn within the depredation of innocence
forcing the incomprehensible blood
to run reversibly through the veins of insanity
creating the vortex of immortality.
creation of one is not the creation of two,
creation of a fool creates surrealistic matter
within the uselessness of delirium,
consequently bringing down the forthrightness of man.
Did I do wrong in a past life?
Do I have to suffer for my past?
What did I do, what have I done to deserve this pain?
Is it my destiny to fail and suffer in pain again?
Has love come to me only to be taken by others?
My legs walk but no steps are taken,
I don't seem to advance as once I did,
Must I do it all again until I get it right?
What is right, what do I need to do to make it right
Are my erections incomplete because of some sin filled act?
Do I loose my thoughts because I was once without pity?
Do my legs ache because I failed to run to the aid of others?
Does my back ache because I have failed to lift the burden from the past?
Have I forsaken my God in a past life?
Or is there no God, only a God of imagination?
Is my pain only in my imagination, am I just an imagination?
Do I really exist in the form I am or am just a wisp of energy?
Are my sacriligionous thoughts my punishment for my disillusions?
Is my God laughing at my improper thoughts?
Do I pull this trigger and die a thousand deaths,
To die over and over until I learn to love my God,
To die over and over until I learn to trust in my God.
All the universal energies that exist in this plane,
My God is all things spiritual and all things true,
I need to follow my God to reach my destiny,
I must leave the evil karma of dishonesty to the past,
To be able to reach for the light of true peace.
They take me back to times before, which now have long gone by.
That filled me full of hopelessness and filled me full of fear,
To remind me of sad memories and of tears I used to cry.
The pains of my first lover, that kiss that took my heart,
We faced our future unafraid, our lives so full of hope.
With promises to hold our love, until death does us part,
And when our world it fell apart, somehow we could not cope.
That love you had just disappeared, I had to set you free,
You took my heart and crushed it, with pain right to my core.
When you told me that your heart, was no longer meant for me,
You'd made it so I'd never trust, or love forever more.
I left that place, our sanctuary we'd built on shifting sands,
To face the world with nothing more, than shaking empty hands.