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2002. If you can't win, make the fellow ahead of you break the record. Anonymous

2003. If you carry an onion in your pocket, you will never have a disease.

2004. If you change lines, the one you just left will start to move faster than the one you are now in.

2005. If you chase two rabbits, both will escape.

2006. If you chase two rabbits, you will not catch either one. Russian Proverb

2007. If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.

2008. If you choose not to decide, you still have made your choice.--"Freewill" by Rush

2009. If you choose to live by the sword, then take up the sword and heal thyself.

2010. If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

2011. If you compare yourself to others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

2012. If you consult enough experts you can confirm any opinion.

2013. If you continue to act as you have always acted, and if you continue to see as you have always seen, you will continue to get the results you always had!

2014. If you could kick the person responsible for most of your troubles in thebackside, you wouldn't be able to sit down for two weeks.

2015. If you create a character, you create a destiny.

2016. If you create a habit, you create a character.

2017. If you create an act, you create a habit.

2018. If you cut a dog's head off, you get 25 hours bad luck. It is bad luck to kill a pegasus, unicorn, horse, or similar, if it is pure white in colour. (Followers of Dark and Death tend to disregard this).

2019. If you decide not to choose then you've already made the wrong choice!

2020. If you deliberately stand in the way of another you also stand in the way of yourself.

2021. If you depend on others to make you happy, you will be endlessly disappointed.

2022. If you desire ease, forsake learning. If you desire learning, forsake ease. How can a man at ease acquire knowledge, And how can an earnest student enjoy ease?

2023. If you did manage to get any good shots, they will be ruined when someone inadvertently opens the darkroom door and all of the dark leaks out.

2024. If you didn't get caught, did you really do it?

2025. If you didn't measure it, you didn't do it.

2026. If you didn't write it down, it didn't happen."

2027. If you disclose your alms, even then it is well done, but if you keep them secret, and give them to the poor, then that is better still for you; and this wipes off from you some of your evil deeds.

2028. If you do big things they print your face, and if you do little things they print only your thumbs. --Arthur "Bugs" Baer

2029. If you do not ask the right questions, you do not get the right answers. A question asked in the right way often points to its own answer. Asking questions is the A-B-C of diagnosis. Only the inquiring mind solves problems.

2030. If you do not hope, you will not find what is beyond your hopes.

2031. If you do not sow in spring you will not reap in autumn.

2032. If you do not step on the dog's tail, he will not bite you.

2033. If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people. Virginia Woolfe

2034. If you do not think about the future, you cannot have one.

2035. If you do what you like, you're in trouble. If you like what you do you're a success.

2036. If you do what you should not, you must bear what you would not.

2037. If you do what you've always done, you'll be what you've always been.

2038. If you don't advertise yourself you will be advertised by your loving enemies. -- Elbert Hubbard

2039. If you don't care where you are, then you aren't lost.

2040. If you don't care where you're going any road will get you there

2041. If you don't change your beliefs, your life will be like this forever. Is that good news?

2042. If you don't do it, you'll never know what would have happened if you had done it. (Ashleigh Brilliant)

2043. If you don't do what's best for your body, you're the one who comes up on the short end.

2044. If you don't get everything you want, think of the things you don't get that you don't want.

2045. If you don't go far enough back in memory or far enough ahead in hope, your future will be impoverished.

2046. If you don't have something you want it's because you haven't wanted it enough.

2047. If you don't have the strength of character to change your vote, then you don't have the right to complain.

2048. If you don't have time to do it right you must have time to do it over. --Anonymous

2049. If you don't have what you like you should like what you have.

2050. If you don't hear opportunity knocking, find another door. -- Anonymous

2051. If you don't know how to die, don't worry; Nature will tell you what to do on the spot, fully and adequately. She will do this job perfectly for you; don't bother your head about it.

2052. If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it with a computer. -- Anonymous

2053. If you don't know ladders, don't play go.

2054. If you don't know where you are going, you will end up somewhere else.

2055. If you don't know where your going, you might end up some where else..

2056. If you don't know where you're going how do you expect to get there.

2057. If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.

2058. If you don't know where you're going, you'll end up somewhere else.

2059. If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you're old. -- Ed Howe

2060. If you don't like it, you may lump (=put up with) it.

2061. If you don't like the weather in New England, just wait a few minutes. --Mark Twain

2062. If you don't like yourself, you can't like other people.--Lazarus Long by Robert A Heinlein

2063. If you don't love, you can't live; if you don't live, you can't love. (Jason Benson)

2064. If you don't mind throwing tennis balls for eternity, I do have an opening in doggie heaven.

2065. If you don't pick up the ball and run with it, someone else will.

2066. If you don't run your own life, somebody else will." - John Atkinson

2067. If you don't say anything, you won't be called on to repeat it. --Calvin Coolidge

2068. If you don't shut up, you're gonna keep talking!

2069. If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.

2070. If you don't take care of your customer, someone else will.

2071. If you don't try to win you might as well hold the olympics in somebody's back yard. Jesse Owens

2072. If you don't understand it, you can't program it.

2073. If you don't want the stork to come, shoot in the air.

2074. If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so that you don't have to work.

2075. If you drink in your pottage, you'll cough in your grave.

2076. If you drink like a fish, don't drive. Swim. -- Joe E. Lewis

2077. If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt.

2078. If you drop a jam sandwich onto the floor, the probability of it landing jammy side down is directly proportional to the cost of the floor covering.

2079. If you eat a live frog in the morning, nothing worse will happen to either of you for the rest of the day.

2080. If you eat fish, be careful of the spines; a spine could be your executioner.

2081. If you eliminate smoking and gambling, you will be amazed to find that almost all an Englishman's pleasures can be, and mostly are, shared by his dog.

2082. If you ever have to support a flagging conversation, introduce the topic of eating. Leigh Hunt

2083. If you ever miss me too much, check your heart and I'll be there.

2084. If you ever need a helping hand, there is one at the end of your arm.

2085. If you expect to open a can of worms you'd best trouble to bring a can-opener.

2086. If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.

2087. If you explain something so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.

2088. If you fear making anyone mad, then you ultimately probe for the lowest common denominator of human achievement. 1978--Jimmy Carter, 39th US President

2089. If you feel that you have both feet planted on level ground, then the university has failed you.

2090. If you find an error, if you know the origin of one of the unattributed quotes, or if you have an aphorism of your own, please make a contribution.

2091. If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded. -- Maya Angelou

2092. If you find no fish, you have to eat bread.

2093. If you find your mind tempted and entangled in greed, you must suppress the greed and control the temptation; be the master of your own mind.

2094. If you follow reason far enough it always leads to conclusions that are contrary to reason. --Samuel Butler

2095. If you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track, which has been there all the while waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living.--Joseph Campbell

2096. If you gave me something I need more than you do, you've given me a gift;If you've given me something you need more than I do, you've gifted me with love.

2097. If you get all the facts, your judgment can be right; if you don't get all the facts, it can't be right. --Bernard M. Baruch

2098. If you get them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.

2099. If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

2100. If you give 100%, God will make up the difference!